Everything I know about dating I learned from leading men in romantic comedies. That’s why I’ve been able to compile this list of lessons learnt from trying that stuff out in 21st Century America, which is where and when I live. I did this so you don’t have to, brothers. You’re welcome.
- Do not deliberately run into a beautiful woman on the sidewalk so you can help pick her stuff up/do a double take/smile slowly. She will be very frustrated and might be late to work.
- You do not just meet the love of your life by MOVING TO NEW YORK CITY. In fact, you pay your life savings for a studio apartment the size of the rat who shares it with you.
- Throwing pebbles at her bedroom window is an arrestable offense. Just call her cell phone.
- Do not guess, at least out loud…
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